The end of the school year always brings a storm of emotions with a long “to-do” list. Preparing for these final weeks could feel impossible for those leaving AAS, including myself. For decades, international schools have supported departing families with the acronym RAFT: Reconciliation, Affirmation, Farewells, and Think Destination. It seems straightforward: leave on a positive note, express gratitude, engage in meaningful goodbyes, and look forward to the future. If you do this, maybe you will float into the future, or maybe, if you’re anything like me, it will take some extra patching and paddling.

While I feel well-versed in how to depart in a healthy manner, I’ve found myself struggling with feelings of frustration and disappointment over the last few months. This process has been challenging despite a framework as emotions run high and logical thinking occasionally falters. When living with the uncertainty of the future, disrupted routines, and shifts in my support system, my RAFT has needed some repair. I’m realizing, that as I let go of an identity I’ve been accustomed to, I might replace my RAFT altogether. I’d like to share three ways I am trying to navigate through this; maybe it will be helpful to others transitioning in our community.

• Lean into support from others. I am stubbornly independent and can confidently move from one place to the next “on my own,” so this step is harder than it should be. However, having moments with my friends is, without a doubt, getting me through this, and being able to speak with another friend who is also going through a similar transition helps remind me that when I am ready to lose it, this is normal.
• These conversations with friends taught me the importance of creating a small amount of space each day just to “be.” Be sad. Be frustrated. Be excited. Be nervous. Be overwhelmed. Don’t change it, sit in it. Now, my challenge with this is I can easily sit all day in some of these emotions and get myself into a spin. So, I set a timer for five minutes, and when the timer goes off I move on with my day. I return to my responsibilities and…
• Let things go. Seriously, let it go. Sing Frozen if you must. We do not need to do ALL the things. We do not need to leave things perfectly. Some things will be forgotten, missed, or ignored. At the end of the day, we will be okay. We will figure it out. We will move on. And everyone else will move on as well.

For those who are leaving, remember that the transition process started the moment you found out you were leaving, not when you physically left Sofia or AAS. This process could also continue for several years before you feel settled again. Throughout this journey, with all its ups and downs, keep in mind that the best way to care for others is by taking care of yourself. Discover small daily practices that can help you manage and support yourself through this time.

For those supporting someone who is leaving, please be gentle with us. I promise we are doing our best.

Finally, for anyone I’ve had the pleasure of working with over the last 2 years, thank you for the amazing memories. I’ve had so much fun with all of the elementary kiddos and can’t wait to see what the future holds for them.

For more information on RAFT.

Books for Transitions

• Elementary: Invisible String, The Kissing Hand, Boomer’s Big Day, Sammy’s Next Move, The Mission of Detective Mike, and I always recommend watching InsideOut
• Secondary: Arrivals, Departures, and the Adventures In-Between; Girl Uprooted
• Adults: Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds, Raising Up a Generation of Healthy Third Culture Kids, Misunderstood: The Impact of Growing Up Overseas in the 21st Century

If you need any additional resources, please speak with your child’s counselor!